2008-09-16 - 11:35 a.m.
my daughter keeps asking me how come i haven't done the dishes. (they're quite overflowing out of the sink and across the counter.) and i'm like, DUHHH, CUZ I DON'T WANT TO??
honestly, who wants to do the dishes, really??
my car is in danger of leaving my possession very soon. i keep missing payments and then i try to make up for the payment and then something else happens like my electric gets turned off or i run out of gas. very tragic. i've come to a point in my life that i really very nearly entertain the thought of prostituting. i am so poor. i am in debt. i am owing money for things i don't even have yet. like a place to live?? well, i'm in a place to live currently. but it's going to end soon.
and i talked to this guy the other night. he's so cute and funny. and he's not a dick. and he's not like TOO INTO himself. and i haven't talked to him at all since then. and i want to. he has a bunch of pictures of him and his friends (girls and guys) having fun and they're posted on his myspace and i'm jealous cuz i want him to take me to all those fun places. he's also interesting and artistic and just a really neat person. so without chasing him off or seeming too eager, how do i relay the fact that: I REALLY DIG HIM AND CAN TOTALLY SEE A FUTURE WITH HIM LIKE NOW. see? that sounds desperate.
and i don't know how not to be desperate. at job interviews, i'm a desperate fuck. with guys, i'm a desperate fuck. when it comes to money, i'm a desperate fuck.
but i guess i just have to go do the dishes. and take a shower and make coffee. seriously, just between you and me, i haven't taken a shower since like wednesday. that's a whopping six days ago. hahaha. but i also haven't made coffee for that long either. or obviously done the dishes since then either. hmmm. something about a four day weekend that really just stagnates me. i'm like gelled gravy. or is it jelled gravy? whatever it is when fat and sauces seperate and you see some disgusting gushy quasi-solid form on the edges...that's me.
