2000-07-02 - 18:47:15
It is not 18 fucking 47...it's 2:52 in the pm. Anyway, I think I need bigger dosages of stuff that make people better able to deal with others. I don't go out on rampages or anything, but, I've become very sour. Sour is the only way to describe it. That little fucking bitch came to the door the other day, and I hope she never comes back ever again, but, here's what happened: Knock, knock. Who's there? Lil' Bitch. Okay, she never called herself that, and I never ask, I just opened the door with dread, cuz she truly is going to kill me one day (a child of the corn). She told me my kids can come over and play. Me and the kids were the only ones home, my boyfriend was elsewhere. I told her like always, NO, THEY CAN'T, THEY CAN'T EVER COME OVER. She looked around and said then, "Well, their dad just came over and said they could." I flipped out but only as much as you can on a four year old who you are not related to...and said, "No, he DIDN'T, DON'T LIE to ME." And she ran down the driveway. She came back ten minutes later and I was like, "WHAT?" And I think she thought about telling me something, but, I talked before her and said, "THEY AREN'T allowed over, they NEVER WILL BE allowed over, because YOU LIED TO ME, their father doesn't even know you OR where you live." She stopped and looked somewhere at the level of my hip and said, "He doesn't?" All bewildered and innocent or some shit. I said, "Nope." And hopefully closed the door for the last time on her little lying face. My boyfriend is not their father, and he would never go over there anyway and say anything like that. So, I don't care if she got confused or what, but, if you are four years old, do NOT piss me off.
Among other things, when people don't listen to me and behave a certain way which I know will turn out badly, and then when things do turn out badly for them because of their behavior which I tried to warn them about, I gain satisfaction when the part happens that consists of things going wrong for them. I no longer feel hurt by their actions, because I told them something bad would happen and I'm always right. No details in particular, just something that happens just about every weekend in my world.
Well, I guess I'm done for now. Oh, I got my hair cut. It is still fairly long, but, shorter and lighter (less heavy), so, this weird "wave" I wasn't aware of is occurring and fucking up the whole look I was trying to go for. Doesn't that suck? My hair was supposed to look sexy and gorgeous and now it just looks fluffy and is high-maintenance.
There, I'm done.
